Dear MBSS Sister,

Needed some advice on how to promote myself when it comes to my work life. Newly separated after a 21 year marriage with 4 kids. Have a degree but just not finding the right work with my kids being home because of Covid. Do you offer any assistance on careers?

 Thanks,

Anonymous

Answer

Dear Sister,

So you’re a pro at managing soccer practice, piano lessons, temper tantrums, leaky faucets, and meal prep, but now it’s time to use your acquired skills to build the career you’re looking for. From feedings and playdates to bake sales and algebra homework, moms have a wide range of underappreciated skills that have value and the experience gained while raising kids leaves us at an advantage that others don’t have. What are those advantages? Well, emotional intelligence for one. We’ve also been there, and we’ve done that, and we finally have the freedom to care less about what others will say and focus more on a comprehensive action plan to move on to landing a job that offers us the flexibility we need with children at home. 

As an image consultant and personal stylist, I have worked with many women across the country to help them step up their image game and use it to achieve their professional goals. Here are 5 tools you can use now to promote yourself and set you on the path towards a career that checks all of your boxes.

1. Returnships Let’s face it. The learning never stops and ensuring we have updated skills relevant to our respective fields is essential in furthering our careers. First, identify what your goal is so that you have the skills to back up the image you are presenting to others. It seems like a no brainer, but if we cannot succinctly state in three sentences or less what our professional goals are, chances are others will not be able to either. Once you know what that goal is, identify the skills needed to make you stand out from the crowd. If you are returning to work after a long hiatus, returnships, which are full time, paid internships for adults, are a great way to transition into a full time career. Companies like iRelaunch are a great resource for getting these positions. If a long hiatus isn’t the issue, there are a multitude of free resources offered from TED Talks to Coursera and edX that can aid you in refreshing your skill set.

2. Social Media I know, I know. We all have our default accounts set up with the profile picture from 7 holidays ago, you know, the one where we cropped out our best friend, but at a time when in person networking has come to a screeching halt, social media has become one of the most important tools in connecting with others. Optimizing your social media presence and increasing engagement with individuals and companies in your field of choice will expose you to opportunities that otherwise may have gone unnoticed. This leads us to the question, what do your profiles say about you? Have you effectively communicated in your headline and summary what you are looking for and what skills you have to offer? It is surprising as to how many individuals will list resume style information with no clear purpose or intent stated, but luckily it is something that can be easily fixed. 

Invest in professional headshots to update your images across your social media platforms. Ensure your headline is clear and concise. Delete obsolete information and update your skills to include that which is relevant to the job you are looking for right now. Value the skills you have. Speak more than one language? Tell us which ones. Finally, connect, comment, and curate. Connect with individuals that are in related fields and actively build relationships with them via personalized correspondence, comment on posts to increase your visibility, and curate content that others can relate to which will in turn bring more exposure to your work. All of these actions should ultimately tie back to your main goal so always remain focused on that. 

While LinkedIn is an obvious choice for many looking to further their careers, Instagram, Facebook,Twitter, and Pinterest can also be effective ways to get the word out that you are ready to accept a position of your choice and have the experience and skills to do so. Understanding that even social posts can have professional implications is important because you never know when a social contact may be a great resource for a professional opportunity. Additionally, networking organizations, such as the American Business Women’s Association, and other industry specific, regional groups, are offering online opportunities to connect with industry professionals for a more engaging experience.

3. Behavior and Communication Now that you have reached out to your network, followed up with job applications, and lined up interviews, what comes next? Practice, practice, practice. We have all fallen into a pattern of communication and behavior that we are comfortable with, but evaluating how we promote ourselves in person, or via Zoom, is key to ensuring our communication style is benefiting us. Katty Kay and Claire Shipman made it very clear in their book The Confidence Code that nagging self-doubt and imposter syndrome plague even the most successful of women, so what should one do about it? For one, stop giving others credit for your accomplishments. Phrase your responses to interview questions and speak up in weekly meetings in a way that promotes the results achieved through your expertise and be specific. Identify key skills that a current boss or potential employer will look for when contemplating who to hire and promote for an open position and come up with specific instances where you implemented your ideas and the results achieved. While it’s nice to be a team player, the other members of your team aren’t the ones being interviewed, so know that it is ok to focus on yourself. Kids are always eager to play pretend games so who better to practice with than a 3’ 9” dinosaur enthusiast who is eager to encourage you? You will be surprised at the insights young children have to offer so don’t be afraid to talk yourself up, remain positive, and accept constructive feedback, even if it’s coming from a pajama wearing eight year old sipping her chocolate milk.

4. Capsule Wardrobe Dressing for success may seem like a cliche, but the reality is people will generate an impression of you within the first seven seconds of meeting you. That means you won’t even have had the opportunity to say hello before they’ve decided whether you’re a good fit for their team. Use your wardrobe to your advantage and be sure to dress with intention, making every accessory count. Take into consideration the role you are looking to step into. Is it management level? Will you be in a creative or corporate environment? Will you be handling essential responsibilities that would require you to be trustworthy? Curate a wardrobe for the position you seek. Invest in age and position appropriate garments that can be coordinated with multiple pieces in your wardrobe and styled appropriately for different occasions. Trousers, pencil skirts, blazers, and blouses, along with a scuff free pair of shoes will be your best friends. When I work with clients to edit their wardrobes, a majority of the time there are pieces hanging out in their closets taking up space that don’t work for them. Quality over quantity is key, so invest wisely. Interesting accessories can also be a way to strike up a conversation and put others at ease prior to effectively communicating why you are the best candidate for the position you seek. 

5. Negotiate Let’s be real. You grew your network, applied for a promising position, interviewed while looking great, communicated why you're the best candidate for the job, and were offered a position, but ultimately, you have a list of must haves to make it worth your while. This is not the time to stop promoting and advocating for yourself. Know what is a non-negotiable to you and don’t be afraid to ask for it. Worst case scenario, they say no and you have other options already lined up. More often than not, we will be surprised by the distances employers will be willing to go for a candidate they know is professional, qualified, and reliable. Salary is not the only item on your list that can be negotiated. If work from home and schedule flexibility is important, make it clear and offer solutions that will work for everyone. Looking to acquire additional certifications? Find out if compensation can be offered by the employer to make this happen. Your future self will thank you.

By identifying clear, attainable goals and using this action plan of promoting yourself to achieve them, you will ensure the cohesive image you are projecting to others is consistent with the confidence and valued skills that you possess. This will translate into the professional advancement and opportunities that you deserve.

Sincerely,

Batul Sadiq

Batul Sadiq is the founder of BHS Image Consulting which provides personal styling services to professional women across the country who seek to continuously empower themselves to achieve their personal and professional goals.

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