So, we’re now a full month into the New Year, February 2021. Maybe you were like me, and you were a tad apprehensive to make any bodacious plans on January first, pausing instead to see if a swarm of walrus-sized locusts were going to descend upon the earth and carry us away to some far-off land. Well, the locusts are now a month late, so you moved from dipping your toe into 2021, to now peering behind its door. Maybe?

Not that any of us really want to, but we can’t help but look back on the previous year, to help us make plans for the coming. 2020 started out with so much promise, even its digits looked catchy, like when my friends and I were too excited, waiting for midnight on December 31st, 1998 to scream out Prince’s hit. But then cue the psychotic, entirely craptastic, plot twist that fooled us all. Somehow, we got through to where we are now, and even if you were lucky enough not to lose a loved one, deal with losing part or all of your income, fight for rights you already thought you had–2020 was still a dick!

So, what does 2021 look like to you, anyway, or better yet, what are you hoping for? How do we really put away the horrors of 2020, move forward? Yes, we should always learn from our mistakes and there were many in 2020. One’s ignored by our politicians, one’s self-inflicted, but crying over spilled milk, or maybe spilled hand sanitizer, month two of 2021, ain’t the way to go.

With umpteen posts on people flat out refusing to even acknowledge, let alone state their New Year’s resolutions - you know the ones that are more proactive; lose weight, get a better job, find love, etc. Don’t get me wrong, these are always winners, solid top five even, but 2020 shook us up in a way that was simply unimaginable. Let’s be honest, it may be a little harder than previous years to lose weight when the snack cupboard was literally in your lap. How can you get a better job with so many out of work? I’m not saying it’s impossible, but it’s certainly not like before. How do you find the love of your life in 2021? Is the mask you’re wearing on Tinder making you look hotter than you really are? Are you even compatible in 2021? Did they binge-watch the same Netflix shows that you did, and if not–why the hell not?

Logic would say that we should just get through whatever 2021 brings, one day, one month at a time. Once we’re able to return to whatever the new normal is–priority number one is seeing all our loved ones in person, in the flesh, and proceeding to hug and kiss them like crazy!

As a list person, I can’t help but come up with a top five, or so, goals of my own for 2021. This could include things I want to do in 2021, that I didn’t get to do in 2020, or planned and paid for in 2020, but British Airways cancelled my flight because of RONA and her pals. Having a list means that as I go through my day-to-day, and come upon some lulls, I can hear it calling me, and pulling my focus. Maybe I won’t complete something 100%, but I can or try to achieve part of it. I use Pinterest as a source and inspiration for my goals, and by inspiration, I mean place I go to and save wondrous ideas into neat folders of things I really want to do at some point, later, only to realize, I’m not that bitch, and that’s OK.

As the locusts didn’t emerge, and I feel somewhat safe enough to create a hacked-version of my usual goals, here’s where I’ve chosen to do in 2021. I’ll tweak it as I go along- maybe.

1.     Acceptance: I’m not that bitch, and that’s OK.

2.     Kindness: Be nice to yourself. You haven’t been, and you know it.

3.     Empathy: Still wear your mask until told by sensible medics, not to. You’re smarter than that.

4.     Learning: Teach yourself, or you and your kids, one old school adult lesson, every month e.g., how to write a check (cheque), you know, for that one person who still won’t switch to Venmo, damn it, Dave!

5.     Commitment: Finish one, just one goal on your bucket list e.g., if you just can’t write the entire book about the girl with the thing in that far-off land, turn it into a short story. I bet you that will fire-up those dusty, creative juices.

6.     Socialize: Go outside. And no, not to get your Amazon package, that’s still your house. Out-outside.

7.     Self-Love: Do one thing per week, that’s totally selfish e.g., take that bubble bath and let the kids, dog, whoever, know what knocking on the door will mean! Or have lunch OUTSIDE by yourself, or in the parking lot at Target, eating a cupcake, and no - you didn’t bring any home for the rest of the family.

8.     Gifting: Put those damn clothes on Poshmark already, or Donate them! They’ve had enough of a joyride in your car for the last two years. Let them be a blessing to someone else.

9.     Health: Commit to one healthy goal. If you do more, perfect, but one is a realistic start. Don’t go all crazy and sign up for the Iron Woman knowing you’re the chic who still loops a parking lot twice for the closer spot-so trifling. Or make wild claims that you’ll never eat another Chocolate Bomb ever again. Err, dial it down, Daisy! 

We all took a beating in 2020. Go easy on yourself and others, and as the world opens up, so can we.